Slow news year at the Chronicle

By Patrick Mattimore
Posted April 6, 2004

Patrick Mattimore

Let's assume that it is November 2001 and you are an editor at the San Francisco Chronicle. You assign a reporter to do an in-depth story that will engage that reporter for two years. The result of that reporter's work will be a 39-part serial saga that will run in the Chronicle daily and will be by far the longest series the newspaper has ever run. So here are two questions.

1. Is "Northern California's Largest Newspaper's" saga about?
(A) America's preparedness to wage a war on terror and who it will be fighting
(B) Inside and outside the California legislature
(C) The Presidential campaign trail for 7 Democratic hopefuls
(D) A primer on San Francisco politics and agencies
(E) The making of California wine

2. In your introductory article to the serial which will run until the middle of May you choose to headline the story in 72-point type on your Sunday front page with which of the following?
(A) "Inside Terror"
(B) "Behind Closed Doors"
(C) "Aspirations to Lead"
(D) "City Governance"
(E) "Grape"

If you answered (E) in questions 1 and 2 congratulations because you have the paucity of judgment, lack of proportion, and contempt for your readers that is a hallmark of whichever editor approved this colossal waste of time.

When I first came across the Chronicle headline Sunday, I wrongly assumed that it was just a slow news day and that the other 38 parts of the "fascinating" tale would be contained in a book somewhere or other. Whoops was I mistaken! The opening day 62-paragraph salvo in the Chronicle's wine fest was merely an aperitif for the drunken debauchery which will surely follow.

Alas, I was also apparently wrong to believe that the Chronicle is publishing the "saga" as a sop to its wine advertisers. In a Grade the News post, according to an anonymous person who describes himself (herself) as "someone familiar with the Chronicle newsroom," that writer expresses the following opinion about the upcoming Chronicle thriller:
"I actually doubt that the Chron derives enough income from wine-related advertisers to back up charges of pandering. I would pin it more on self-indulgence, overconfidence and a high-level editor known among the staff as 'Wing Nut'."

No one will ever again accuse the Chronicle of ignoring big stories as the wine saga, which will catalogue the path of a bottle of wine from vineyard to table, builds drama. The story's author, Mike Weiss sure knows how to titillate us. He writes in the initial 1/39th part of the story: "On the surface, the winery presented an incomparable picture of graciousness and good living…Just below the surface, though, I sensed tension, and perhaps secrets."

Sure hope no real news intrudes upon the saga. Can't wait for Thursdays when we'll get not only Parts 5, 12, 19, 26, and 33, but our usual weekly dousing of the Chronicle's pull-out "Wine" section.

The author retired as the chairman of the social studies department at South San Francisco High School in 2002 and now writes about a variety of issues. His letters and opinions have been published in the New York Times, the San Jose Mercury News, and the San Francisco Chronicle.

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